“Chris and Uwe” the masters coxed pair are currently taking applications for coxswains. (substitute your favourite crew names).
How to Pick a Cox
Interested parties please complete the multi choice questions below
A) Female
B) Male
C) Transgender person
D) I’m a junior, what’s sex?
2) Weight (note a yes / no answer is not possible)
A) <55KG
B) >55KG, but <100kg
C) >100kg
D) A sack of potatoes / tub of lard
3) Are you the type of cox that…….
A) Shuts up and lets the rowers race their pre organised race plan
B) Forget your race plan, we are doing mine and you are going to listen to my non stop screaming drivel for a 1,000m race
C) In the last 300m you tell the rowers “Dig it in boys, only 50m to go.”
D) What’s a race plan?
4) Steering ability
A) 2015 World darts champion (scored 21x 180s in a row)
B) Where’s the ‘Cruise control’ button
C) “We are going via the lake side café as I want a Latte”
D) “2009 -2015 world champion “bumps racing” coxswain
5) Oar carrying ability
A) “Carry your own f………”
B) “Ooohhh, they look heavy”
C) “Sure thing boys, can I carry your shoes and drink bottles for you too”
D) I’m a princess / princeling / clown / Laurel & Hardy
